yes, i'm not *that* girl

Tuesday, April 03, 2012

...and sometimes i wish i was.


okay, so it tends to be more than sometimes. who doesn't want to be that girl? i'm sorry, i believe i haven't explained myself appropriately.

that girl: the girl who has 1000 followers, doesn't need to post every day to keep her followers, is allowed to post pictures of her face on the internet, has beautiful photography, always looks gorgeous, her posts are so sweet or so cute it makes you want to cry, and even her mistakes are appreciated...*
 i could let this list go on, but i think you have the idea. that girl is seemingly perfect, and we all love her. and, i bet if we all admited it, we all want to be her. and i do ask myself, "is there a down side to sucessful blogging?" because right now i don't see one.

and there possibly isn't any down side. all the more reason to want it.

and that's where i begin to backtrack.

"wait a second," i say. "these people are exactly the same as me. there isn't anything about them that is better than i. worth is not found in follower/comment numbers. worth is found in Christ. my self-worth is dimishing, because my admiration for that girl is heightening."

then i remember this: "behind the veil of her blog, even she has scars. even she makes mistakes. and she tells us every day, thought few notice. we are all caught up in our love of her photos, her blog design that makes you swoon, and her unique writing style. she is loved on her blog more than i, maybe, but at home, in real life, among the people who really matter, the people you know in person, she is not loved more because of it. i'm not going to get more real friends just because i have more followers. and besides, is that even what i want?"

now the answer it crystal-clear. "no."

lately my posts have been completely comment-less. which is my fault, since i told you all i was deleting my blog. you have plenty of reasons to stop following this very instant for my inconsistancies. i wouldn't feel any remorse if you did. mega-kudos too all of you dears who stayed. i can't say thank you enough.

all i want to say is sorry. sorry for being such a dull blogger lately, and sorry for being inconsistent. but no matter what i do, there is always going to be someone above me, someone i look up too. it's up to me to not be jealous of them. it's not up to them to be less-talented. because that would be just plain ridiculous.

thank you for all of your support and love! i promise, HDML is about to get quite colorful. just stay tuned. :)

"Blessed are they that put their trust in Him." - Psalm 2:12


  1. Love this. So so true. I know exactly what you mean. I must admit, I have compared myself to other bloggers countless times. Amazing post.

  2. Wow. Well said, Bree. How many times have I wished I was that girl? Too many times... Awesome post!

    ~Nessima of Arda Nessimava

  3. I often feel exactly the same way, Bree! This is a beautiful post. Really.
    I have struggled with this problem with amount of followers & comments, and most of all "trying to be like those successful blogs out there"... it just ruined everything. The most important thing is to blog about what really matters to you, and to blog for Jesus!

    And I love your blog a lot too!

    P.S. by the way, as a little tiny bit of blogging advice, I personally think random posts are really great from time (to give your viewers a peek into the random and enjoyable things that happen in your life), but readers will eventually tire of too much of it. Just as a way of inspiration, I truly loved the posts you shared your photography in (because they're plain beautiful), and the fashion tips posts, the books you read about and also about your writing. I hope this is a little helpful?)

    ~Joy @

  4. Excellent post, Bree. And I, for one, am thrilled that you've decided to keep your blog up. I'm way more inconsistent about reading than you are about posting, but you always make me smile when I do find a spare five minutes to read blogs. :)

  5. I read once (I forget where) that comparison is the thief of joy. And that is so true. I have myself sometimes wished that I could expand my blog but then I think of all the things I love about my readership the size it is. I know all my regular readers. Not just know their names but really know them and have been able to build friendships with them. It's not in the quantity, it's in the quality.

    Love ya,

  6. I know exactly what you mean, Bree. It is sometimes so hard not to compare your blog 's success with "that" girl's....but you're totally right. It brings you down more than anything. Here's to all of us not-as-popular-but-just-as-amazing bloggers! ;) Keep up the great work.

  7. I totally understand. It is sometimes so hard not to compare yourself to those awesome bloggers. But like you said, it breaks you down more than anything. Keep up the good work, and here's to all of us not-as-popular-but-just-as-wonderful bloggers out there! :)

  8. this is so beautiful and so true. I so very often get so caught up in the fact that I only have eight followers and that a large percentage of my entries are silly, just for fun posts and that I cannot do fashion posts because I'm the most unfashionable girl I know, that I cannot do baking/recipe posts because I kill everything I bake, that I cannot do make-up/hair tutorials because I do not know how to do anything other than the simplicity of my own daily routine. I cannot ever seem to post a poem or song or story that I've written because I'm so afraid of it being rejected. I cannot post any of my photography because it's so awful. I cannot post any videos of my covering a song on my guitar or violin because I know that I cannot play those intruments at all like so many people can. I get so caught up in what I cannot do that I forget what I can do. I get so caught up in what I'm not that I forget what I am. yes, my posts are ridiculous and absurd, but maybe someone might get a little chuckle from them. yes, I've only been a follower of Christ for seven months and therefore, I'm not as far along in my walk as most other girls I know, I can still post little things I'm learning and perhaps help and encourage another girl who is at the same point as I am.

    thank you so much for this post, Bree. it's such a great encouragement to little girls like me xD


Design by Bethany. All images and text displayed here (C) Carmel Elizabeth 2010-16, unless otherwise stated. Please do not steal.